While sitting around the camp fire a few weekends ago, Melissa’s grandmother (Eileen Roesler McCue) and grandfather (Melvin McCue) told us that Eileen’s grandmother (Eleanor Roesler aka Lori) would say to them, “You Never Don’t Know”. After we all chuckled about the double negative flare of this statement, a bright light bulb lit in my mind. I thought and then said, “That is a brilliant statement! I would love to write a blog about it":
“You Never Don’t Know”
We so often say to ourselves or others, “I don’t know” before thinking further or as an escape from thoughts that we do not currently want to ponder or to remove ourselves from an uncomfortable conversation. I believe that we do “know”, in the combination of the body, heart and mind, most things. Sure, there are unknowns along our journeys and things that we have not learned yet, but our intuition or gut “knows” so much more than we allow ourselves to believe.
How many times have you second guessed yourself about something or someone? Have you found that your first instincts were often correct?
We are currently living in a time of what appears to have numerous unknowns:
What are the most effective ways to stop the spread of the virus? Which candidate deserves my vote? Is it time to change jobs or careers? Should I stay in a certain relationship or leave? Is this the best house or town for me to live in or is it time for a change?
This list of questions could go on for pages and I am sure that as you are reading, your own questions are popping into your consciousness.
So…. let’s revert to Eleanor’s (aka Lori’s) statement. She told her loved ones, “You Never Don’t Know”. I never met Eleanor, so I am not sure if she was simply including a “Don’t” in this so often used statement, or if she was trying to instill some wisdom upon her grandchildren. Either way, I am very thankful for stories around the camp fire!
This is the wisdom that I gleaned from this profound statement:
In matters where intuition (body & heart) and knowledge (mind) meet:
We always “Know”, but we do not always Trust ourselves!
So how do we get in touch with the answer(s) and learn to trust?
We need to stop, drop and roll and not react!
Breathe deeply, ask the question and let the body reveal the truth (the “Know”).
Let’s take these two questions on the same topic:
“Do I stay in this relationship”?
Sit with the question.
How does it feel? Is there certainty, joy, relief, relaxation or a knowing?
Then, ask again this way:
“Do I leave this relationship”?
Is there certainty, joy, relief, relaxation or a knowing?
Which one makes you breathe a bit more easily?
Which one brings you peace?
You can pick any topic. Just simply ask the question in two ways:
Do I stay or do I leave this job?
Do I vote for this candidate or a different one?
Do I wear a mask or not?
Do I communicate what I am feeling now or wait for another time?
Do I continue to live here or do I move?
The mind is a very sharp tool and can twist or turn any thought. It needs the connection of the body and heart to bring “knowing”!
The body and heart will always give the answer in the form of relaxation, gratitude, peace, love and warmth. The stomach will calm and breathing will become much easier. The mind will ease!
Listen to Eleanor, aka Lori, the next time you react and state, “I Don’t Know”.
She will whisper, “You Never Don’t Know”!
Let’s practice this together!
Dr Lorri
From one Lorri to another “Lori”, thank-you for your wisdom and may you continue to Rest In Peace!
Thank-you, Eileen Roesler McCue (aka Gram), for allowing me to write this blog !!
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