Has anyone ever asked, "Did you hear what I just said"?
Do you find that you want to be heard before you are ready to listen?
If you answered "yes" to any of the above, you may want to read on to learn how your listening level may affect others. In this time of the "unknown" as we continue to forge our way through COVID-19, I have heard all 3 Levels of Listening in many conversations. Being heard seems to take precedence over listening as the "unknown" makes us weary. There is a "knowledge gap" and divisiveness when Level 1 listening prevails.
If we have any hope of "bridging the gap", please take the time to learn:
The Art of Listening
The different levels of listening are powerful in teaching how to truly hear what one is saying to another, not just through words, but through the emotions behind the words.
Level 1 listening: The listener is consumed with thought while being spoken to and does not hear the message. The listener is not present in the conversation. This usually results in some form of these questions:
“Are you listening to me?” “Did you hear what I just said?”
Level 1 listening creates a gap!
Level 2 listening: The listener is paying attention to the message and thinking of what to say next with the result of hearing a percentage of the words. This is a volley type of conversation. The listener hears words and can understand that they may hold emotion, but does not always "see" or "feel" beyond the words.
Level 2 listening begins to bridge a gap!
Level 3 listening: The listener is fully present, hears every word and feels the emotion behind the words allowing for deeper and more intimate conversation. There is a volley like conversation at a much slower pace allowing the speaker and listener to feel their way through the conversation. This results in the speaker feeling cared for and worthy of the conversation.
Level 3 listening fully bridges the gap!
If you tend to be a Level 1 listener, practice concentrating on the other person's words rather than your thoughts.
At Level 2, practice fully listening before you volley back with your thoughts.
Know that Level 3 listening takes practice, attention and sometimes, training. However, the affinity that this brings to relationships is priceless.
Give someone the true gift of listening today!
Peace, Dr Lorri